I know at least one of you reading this is thinking, “No she didn’t write a blog about her panties.” But yes, yes, I have written a blog about my panties. And, lucky for you, you don’t even have to pay a dollar to see them.
NOTE: I’ve just used the word panties four times even though I HATE the word “panties.” It doesn’t matter who uses it, either. My grandmother innocently speaking about laundry. The sales woman checking you out at a lingerie store. A guy looking to buy some used on craigslist. Nobody can say that word without it sounding gross. It’s right up there with the words “purse” and “moist.” Imagine them being used in the same sentence! BLEUCH!
Well, I am going to now use the word “panties” all over this blog post…if only to make myself vomit that amazing waffle breakfast I had this morning.
But I won’t be talking about just ANY of my panties. (thank goodness, right!?) Today’s discussion is about a specific pair of panties that I just bought:
I bought these ruffled panties about a week ago at Target. Suuuure, you may not think of Target as the highest of lingerie potential and quality…and you would be right…but you will be even more impressed when I tell you these particular panties were on the clearance rack for $2.00. TWO DOLLARS! Nothing but the best for my cheeks.
I like ruffles on shirts, coats, hats, shoes…but I’ve never splurged for ruffled panties. This is probably because all the previous items I mentioned are on the outside of what you’re wearing. Panties, on the other hand, are underneath the rest of your clothes. Even this little girl’s ruffled panties make her cute little lavender shirt pop open. Let’s face it, ruffles are bulky.
Which is why, I’m sorry to say, my ruffled panties have turned out to be a poor purchasing decision on my part. You see, not only are they cumbersome under my jeans, but they don’t look that good by themselves. And, while I obviously didn’t try them on at Target before I bought them, I thought for sure when I got them home (and washed them…always wash your panties before you wear them), I thought I would look like this girl:
But I looked more like this girl:
(Um…not that she looks bad….)
I mean, I’m NOT going to throw my ruffle panties away or anything…they cost me 2 BUCKS! But I probably won’t be investing in new ruffle panties. At least not until it becomes my work uniform…or I Benjamin Button my way back to 18 months old.
Well, that’s all I have to say on this subject, really. If this has been helpful to you in any way, I’d be f’ing surprised, quite honestly. BUT I always like to look on the bright side (*cough*), so at worst you just got to look at soft-porn on the web while at work! You’re very welcome.